Most mobile providers provide a method for sending SMS messages to handset by email, although many do not publicise this capability. Messages sent to these specially formatted email addresses are forwarded directly to your mobile device. In effect this service gives you free SMS messaging from PC to mobile phone.

It can take time to get this information direct from your mobile provider, so I’ve compiled a database of all known SMS Email addresses used by the major international networks.

To get your own personal SMS Email address, use the automated form to generate your own personal address.

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Vincent’s Van Scoff

August 21, 2006

Vincent's Van Scoff (Photoshop mock up)

Great name for a mobile food outlet, if your name is Vincent. Above is a Photoshopped mock-up (poor) I’ve done using an old Ford white van. Nice. Seriously though, can somebody please use this, it’s sending me crazy with excitement.*

* make mental note to get out more.

Everyone loves tea, right? But with so much competition in the market, you need an edge. Introduced in late 2005 Tea B was a revolution in the nations favourite drink. Named after the blend that produced it’s unique flavours (Tea A tasted like gnats piss), it quickly hit the markets & took the world by storm.

Like Guiness and other health drinks, Tea B was subject to a number of wild claims for those that drank of it”s amber-ish nectar. While claims included such standards as improved fertility, wealth, eyesight & hair growth, perhaps the most bizarre was Tea B’s apparent ability to raise the dead. This is the first recorded incidence of a family drink with supernatural powers. However, behind these wild claims there was a truth was far more chilling. In a sequence of events somewhat reminiscent of Coca Cola’s experience with it’s delicious Dasani bottled water, it was discovered that Tea B could in some cases cause illness, death and a nasty cough – though not neccessarily in that order. The manufacturers were quick to react to this ”image problem” however and, with the help of the nations best-loved celebrities – launched an intensive, nationwide, advertising campaign extolling the virtues of the drink. At the time of going to press none of those involved are now available for comment, being dead. However, if quoted claims are true, they may be back.

In another stroke of luck for the manufacturers, it was discovered that most of the negative effects of Tea B could be counteracted with a good diet and antibiotics. This opened up a whole new opportunity for cross-selling, multi-packs & special offers which kept Tea B sales refreshingly high for the remaining years.

Now, Tea B’s success is on the wane, with other drinks such as Dasani filling the niche for fashion-conscious drinks with a hint of danger. However, for those wishing to relive their youth Tea B is available from most of your local badgers and a small store in Chiswick.

Tetley MAX

August 21, 2006

Tetley MAX

Introduced in 2005, this exotic blend of tea, B6, B12, Taurine, Caffeine, Ginseng, Guarana & L-Cartine is guaranteed reach parts other tea didn”t even know existed. Picked, licked & blended by hand this fine tea has survived the wave of health fads & sensible drinks to be the no. 1 gateway drug at Buckingham Palace. While blenders readily admit excessive use may lead to the consumption of filter coffee, they also question why anyone would want to drink coffee when this is better.

Instead of normal Tetley (which proudly claims to contain “less caffeine than a cup of coffee”) Tetley Maxtm is made with the maximum caffeine content scientifically possible, some other random chemicals with exciting, energising-sounding names, and bleach.

Want some yourself? You could try contacting Tetley for a free sample. Please enjoy the “artists impression” of the box.